How to get what you want....

In December of 2006, I came back to the university that I had to leave becuase of financial problems, to an office full of people that told me I would not be able to graduate by May of 2009. Furthermore, that I would not be eligible for any financial aid to cover the tuition costs.

The reason for the deadline was my grandfather's health. Out of the Umpteen grandchildren in my Hispanic family, I wanted to be the first to show my Grandparents just how grand they had taken care of me, by being the first to graduate college.

Long Story short, My grandfather passed away January 1st 2007. Taking away my chances for accomplishing my dream of sharing success with him.

It got harder.....During the rest of my pursuit for my degree, I was fortunate enough to encounter some other adversities...
1- My mother had lost her dream house due to financial difficulties.
2- My brother and I had lost touch, and I decided to cut off the relationship because He should have blah blah blah..
3- I was having to work over 40 hours a week just to pay for college.
4- The woman that I was madly in love with decided to leave...This hurt the most.

There were other things, but they were not as impactful.

Through all of this, I could take meaning in my suffering, that I would appreciate getting my degree more than anyone else in my class. That I had a slim opportunity at turning around things so rapidly, and so quickly, or letting everything fall apart.

Through all of the hurt, I was able to strengthen my faith, and increase the depths of my relationships with friends. It all came down to what I decided to do...


There comes a time in everyone's life, where we decide that we want something. When we decide that the feelings that we are getting from our days are not enough,and that we want more. That we are tired of the same old same old, and letting ourselves feel bad about things that may have happened in the past.

Tony Robbins believes that we are a therapy culture, and that our past defines us. We share experience's that we have been through, and due to the law of commonality, we feel closer to them. Misery loves company sometimes..

I am sure that Myself, and you do not want these types of connections anymore. Thinking about how hard the days are, and how bored we feel, and how mundane the day feels sometimes.

We were not built this way. The Titans of industry, the Carnegies, the Rockafellars, the Astor's and every other family that mastered the art of building an empire did their best in securing their lifestyle by creating companies that had specific, defined roles, that would give people just enough meaning to earn an income; and feel like they were contributing to their company. The roles that they defined led to the way that our corporations treat their employees. But the design of lifestyle was left for us to master.

The spirit of discovery lies dormant in each and every one of us. We are built with the curiosity of the curious. To find new lands, and to learn new ideas, and to experience a new life. Excitement, Passion, Desire, Taking yourself down a road, and then being happy about what you see. Do you remember what it felt like to be that little kid reading about your favorite hero? How excited you were to think that you can do the same? How you imitated that person or idea with everything you had. I can remember taping towels to my back and pretending I was superman.

Jim Rohn said it best when he hit me with "If you change, then everything will change for you"

So Find the things that you want, Change to put yourself on a path towards what you want, and all you have to do is keep going. The question then changes from How can I..... To when is this going to happen? Feel what that does when you ask yourself that question. Imagine what it would be like if you stopped worrying, and started living by faith. When you feel what it is like to be excited about what is going to happen, rather than worry about what isn't happening. Think about it, Imagine it, associate emotion to it, and then Watch it happen right in front of your eyes!!!! I promise it will happen.

Robbins confirms the above by stating: " We do what we do because of what we associate Pain to, and what we associate pleasure to."

Decide what you want, understand why you want it, and ask yourself the right questions about how to get it. Most importantly. Learn what it will feel like. Associate massive amounts of pleasure to it, and you will never give up on it.

It is my pleasure to share with you, that on May 16th 2009; after being told that I could not do it. That there was no chance. With all of the other things in my life deterring my focus. That with all the hurt, and all the pain, and all the mental anguish. With all of the thoughts that race through your head while you are studying in the library at midnight by yourself. When life feels like it is dumping on you, you can look up, see what is falling, and know in your heart of hearts that it does not matter. That no matter how hard things get. You have made a decision, and all you have to do is stick to it. That everything will be ok, and you will make it.

I walked across that stage in front of thousands of strangers with tears of relief, joy, and ultimate happiness. An Empowered feeling, that this moment was mine, and nobody can ever do anything to take that away from me. That I can do what I say I am going to do.

I shook each and every one of my professors hands that day as I walked down the stage. They could see the tears in my eyes. They could feel my pain. Some of them even cried with me. And as I walked back to my seat. I sat down and put my face in my hands, and finally cried all of the pain out. While my friends were busy celebrating...I knew I had to let the pain out and finally let it go. When I lifted my head, It was like I was looking at a new world. Thank you to God, and all of my friends for being there. Thank you to those who told me not to give up. And thank you to everything that was hurtful during that time. It made me who I am today.

How did I get what I wanted? I decided...committed...focused...and fought with more than I was, so that I could become more than I have ever been.

"If you change, everything will change for you." Jim Rohn


Best of luck!!

JC

Transformational Vocabulary

So today was a great day! I was able to catch up with a friend that I had not seen in Three and a half years! It was interesting to hear how she has grown, and what new challenges that she was going through.

If it was not for yesterday's realization, and posting, I would have not had the same conversation that I did today. It is a far better feeling to speak of accomplishments and passed milestones, then to remain focused on shortcomings and failures. We can see how the excitement in our lives leads to emotions in others.

It was interesting to hear of the emotional patterns that we experience. I could not help but remember the lessons that I had learned from Tony Robbins book "Awaken the Giant Within" about emotional patterns, and why we act the way that we do in our lives. The book has helped me tremendously in such a little time, that I have done my best to look at the things that I do in my life, and wonder if they can be done more efficiently.

We pursue things because we think that those things will make us feel a certain way. Robbins challenges you to think why you want the things that you want in life, and demonstrates that the reason for the cars, and the house, and the over-sized Television is to fill us with the feeling of abundance and luxury. However, what if you were able to have those feelings without having to accomplish/buy all of those things? That is what has been challenging me this past month.

Times are changing;business, education, finances, literature and health are all announcing new advancements in their benefits to our population. Yet, we spend a majority of our time finding a role to fill in. It leaves one flabbergasted to think of a great and powerful life filled with freedom and flexibility, while we obtain jobs that fulfill the same roles everyday. How can we desire change, while performing the same routine? When our actions do not match our words, we have trouble believing in ourselves. It affects everything that you do. Mr. Shakespeare was right when he wrote' "to thine own self be true".

In the future, I will be posting links to some of the different books that are referenced in this blog. I will also be updating with tasks/or actions that might help you in your everyday life. Please comment below with feedback about what you would like to see or read about.

I wish you a wonderful rest of the week!

JC

165lb Snatch!!!! It's a Process...leading to the accomplishment of a Balanced Life...

I must say, that it is very nice to have the next week off due to work holidays! Although I do not feel any less busy than I am, when I am required to go to work.

The Gym was very unforgiving today. If anyone has ever attempted a snatch lift, then they can tell you exactly how hard it is to do. I was humbled today, when I could only snatch 165lbs off of the ground this morning. Considering that I can push press 225 from a standing position!!!

Guess the crossfit Gods wanted me to realize that there is no substitution for hard work. Drew was there today, and he is a freakishly strong manimal, not only can he lift more weight than I can, but he weighs 90lbs less!!! Today's time lifting with him put a whole new meaning to the phrase comparing apples to oranges. I realized that my technique was horrible, that I am not as flexible as I thought I have become, and that I really need to work on my Olympic lifts more.

After almost dropping the weight on my head three times, he pulled me aside for some constructive criticism. It amazed me how much detail he was able to notice in my technique. That there was a lot that I had to learn about my body, and how it moves to maximize it's output.

It was then that an old chapter from the 21 Irrefutable laws of leadership from John Maxwell shot into my mind. I could literally feel the memory, as it made it's way into my cognitive theater. Drew reminded me that things in life are a process. That the law of the process applies to everything. WE tend to focus so much on the end result of things, that we ignore the process that we are going through. This becomes a breeding ground for disappointment, complacency, self doubt, and depression. To only be focused on the end result, and not even take the time to look back at how far you have come? This is a formula for self-deprecating mental suicide. No wonder my confidence has been in question lately. I have spent so much time concerning myself with the results that I want in my life, that I have not given myself credit for all of the things that I have accomplished in the last year.

Taking it one step further, Tony Robbins suggests that the questions that we ask ourselves define the reference points, and how we feel about the progress in our lives. I have been asking myself the question of: "Why don't I have what I want? Why don't I feel like I have accomplished anything? Why does it feel like I am falling short in everything that I do? This is all that I have been asking myself, and as a result, I have Chosen to focus on that. Whatever you focus on, is what you are going to get, feel, and experience in your life.

When Drew reminded me today of "leadership develops in a day, not daily." My focus instantly changed. I could feel my posture straighten, and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up from the jolt of electricity down my spine. It was as if all of the things that I have failed at were no longer in the spot light, and my accomplishments had taken center stage.

Quick Recap on the 2009....

1. Graduated from college in May with a major in Finance, and minor in Econ. Despite being told that I could not graduate from UNR by then because of past performances. -Education

2. Became an ordained minister to perform the wedding of my best friend. - Faith

3. Have gained 10 lbs of muscle mass, and radically changed my body composition - physical

4. Resigned from a greatly admired company here in town, and obtained a position at a smaller, but faster paced corporation with more promise of opportunity. - Professional

5. Traveled to Europe on my own dime, hit up Germany, Holland, Italy, Spain, and Canada in two weeks, and was so amazed at myself for not missing a beat; while increasing my comprehension of Spanish, and Italian. - Travel

6. Helped at least 3 friends redefine their personal relationships with people, and increased the happiness in their lives, simply by showing them that they were capable, and amazing people. - Charity/ Selflessness

7. Made progress on giving things up from the past that used to bother me. I have never held onto negative experiences, and held them over my head before, until a couple of years ago. I have finally started to lay some of those burdens down. - Emotional

8. Became a regular Blood donor for someone else in need that I will probably never meet. - Philanthropic

There are more, but for the sake of this blog, I need to wrap it up.

So the ability to change ones state, lies in what you focus on. Your body is smarter than your head will ever be, that is another post entirely, but Logic can never cure an emotion. Only action can. Choosing what to focus on, is what is going to govern your states, and your progress. I went from feeling depressed and like a failure, to feeling happy and accomplished in a matter of seconds. Reflecting on my past years progress showed me that I have Led a balanced, Healthy life with accomplishments in : Education - Faith- Physical - philanthropic-Emotional- Travel- Charity and Professional aspects of my life. Guess I didn't do that bad. In the end, it is good to see that the standards that you hold yourself to, lead to a healthy, balanced life, and that you really have to pay attention to the process, not just the end result.

Hope that this might have helped you out as well. Until next time!

Love,

JC

Regret

What a night not to remember! I was initially upset with the fact that I was going to miss the Santa Pub crawl. Yet. I still managed to obtain my goal of failing at basic behavior. The corporate party was amazing last night! Had a lot of fun dancing with people and smiling. Great conversations, and even better drinks. That was the downfall.....

Woke up with casino security looking me in the eye. Officer Johnny was extremely endearing when he escorted me out of the casino, and out into the snow. Had to go back down to the bottom floor to get my jacket from the coat check that was closed. Security had to get it for me. I know, Efficient.

After that, made a bad decision and arrived at my home to find all of the doors locked, and bittersweet memories of my keys laying on my bed in my house that was locked. My wonderful decision tree then led me to pass out in the car and fall asleep, with my neck completely bent over. There is an increase of intensity when your body responds to harsh conditions. The freezing temperature led my body to react, and fill me with temporary instant super strength. Without any thought or consequences for my actions my foot decided to have intercourse with the door I found myself immersed in a heat wave as the door swung open.

At least I got to lay in my own bed; left to ponder what the hell happened after the party, and who I was supposedly with.

Lessons learned:

1- Make sure that you have a cell phone that holds a charge for more than an hour. Therefore, you can contact friends that may be able to help you out when you are unconscious.

2- Don't rely on people that you have only known for two months to help you out when you blackout.

3- Never Drive Drunk

4- Make sure that you have keys to open your house. Doors were made to be opened with a key not a foot.

5- Do not drink faster than you can pee. At the urinal, count by second the amount of time you actually pee for. This should be equivalent to the number of drinks that you have had so far. If your pee-time (in seconds) is less than the amount of drinks that you have consumed to that point. SLOW DOWN and start drinking water.

6- There is nothing more enlightening and humbling than posting all of this crap on the internet.

Resourcefulness rather than resources

Today was a ridiculous adventure!

The most snow that I have seen in Reno since the movie Gladiator came out.

The 96 Acura had difficulties making it up the hill to work today, so I ended up parking her little but at the bottom of the hill, and walking. However, rather than being upset about the fact that I was forced to walk in the snow, I found it rather refreshing. Half of our office didn't show up today, and I was surprised to learn that schools were closed.

Tip of the day:

Focus on what you are doing. The little things make the biggest difference. Dialing the wrong number on a telephone, and being so busy that you forgot who you were calling, but were still comfortable enough to start the conversation like you knew who they were...Doesn't work that well.

I've decided to change my focus.....Going to try and be an alternate for the average man Olympics. Hopefully I can take home the Gold for Reno in the 4x6 heads up seven up competition.

Peace

Launch

Hello My Dear Friends,

Due ot the amount of email, facebook, twitter, and all of the other social mediums, it makes it difficult to make sure that I contact everyone individually, to "catch up". So I have created this blog to let the people that want to know what I am up to, and how my life is going. Specific details are always available upon request, and personal contact is always preferred, but this might be the best way to broadcast achievements and new milestones. There is a certain amount of vulnerability that surfaces when you make your journal entries public. Hopefully some of the events or realizations can help in some way....

You can always email me at joseph.w.campbell@gmail.com if you wish to get in contact....

Lots of Love.

JC